ta-ta darlings. i'm leaving this place and never coming back. i'm moving on to a new phrase in life. *muack*
littlegirl starlet--------------11:20 am
Saturday, December 06, 2003
my computer's in repairs and i'm on my uncle's computer now. he doesn't really need this computer, i guess he just uses it for 4-D (gambling). heh. great news! i bought my new year bottoms today. and i'm pleased with them. was quite cranky but it turned out fine in the end.
club 21's famous sale of dkny clothings was on in takashimaya so i snapped up these pair of jeansy-stretchy hipsters. um... almost all of my bottoms are hipsters. i thought my thighs looked fat as usual but my aunt said they looked slim, so... whatever. it's pretty snug. but not skin-tight. i don't think i could breathe.
usually i hate buying clothes because i can never find those which look good on me. bleah. anyway i'm going on a diet of fruits, like dominique, eh sam? haha. i think by chinese new year, i should have lost weight. plus i would have PE by then.
next stop, we headed to the DFS(duty-free shopping) centre next to a hotel which is next to pacific plaza. everything was branded; gucci, burberry, polo ralph lauren, bulvgari etc. i just had fun getting shocked at the exhorbitant prices and imagining owning the luxury items. heh.
we went to pacific plaza after that and it was great! i spotted a pair of dressy dark-brown courdory hipsters or something like that in roxy. i checked my dkny jeans and found that it was made in italy! now that's good. but the roxy pants were made in china. ah well, we can't have everything can we.
i felt quite bad, buying all these expensive bottoms. my 3rd aunt always buys my chinese new year clothes. luckily she didn't have to buy shirts and blouses because my 2nd aunt bought them for me.
chose another pair --- semi-brown snug knee-length pants. surprisingly, these 2 brown pairs made me look slimmer than i looked, so you could imagine how pleased i was. and they are dressy, which means i can wear them to orchard and look good. i wish there were more pants like these.
well, gotta go have dinner. we're having flower crabs!
littlegirl starlet--------------7:46 pm
Thursday, November 27, 2003
ok everyone is putting up lists. here's mine, a mix of everything.
rachael's list for Nov/Dec 2003 1. lose 5 kg (or more)
2. tone my arms and thighs
3. buy new sleeveless tops after i've toned my arms. heh.
4. get a tan
5. buy new books to read
6. borrow books to read
7. practise writing
8. make christmas presents
9. go out with friends
10. lose 5 more kg. haha.
11. buy a new bag for school
12. new shoes? maybe not
13. sports unmentionables
14. ankle socks
i think that's all. here's another.
rachael's exercise plan for nov/dec 2003 1. jog every morning
2. 20 push-ups after morning jog
3. 30 sit-ups after morning jog
4. jog every evening
5. 20 push-ups after evening jog
6. 30 sit-ups after evening jog
littlegirl starlet--------------10:44 pm
Wednesday, November 26, 2003
i had a horrible dream. all of us were in a school, after the exams. suddenly, the chinese teachers started to get us to sit down and handed out pieces of paper. there were many students and it was rather noisy. it was a messy sight. after some sort of briefing, the crowds dispersed for a break. no one knew what was happen but since there were chinese teachers, i thought it was the chinese 'O's oral exam.
i was scratching my head, wondering why there was another oral exam when we'd already finished our exams. after the break, we congregated in a wide area and in front of us were all these steps. it seemed to be so steep. they asked us to check our register numbers and even though our numbers didn't seem to be right, no one did anything. so we just dumbly sat there.
there were rows and rows of chinese teachers sitting in pairs, behind the school desks, just like chinese oral. it was very complicated and when one teacher told us where to go after our number was called, i couldn't understand. all i could do was to wait and follow the person in front of me.
when my number was called, i frantically ran up the stone steps and when i reached the top, i was overwhelmed by the sight of rows of teachers. my mind went blank and i just stood there in terror. after a while, i scanned the tables in front of me. there were so many teachers, i didn't know who to go to.
so i just walked straight up to the nearest one. and sat down. she didn't look at me, nor respond to my greeting. disheartened, i got up and walked to the table next to it. as i sat down, the teacher cruelly said, "weren't you paying attention to the instructions just now? you don't even know how to get to the correct seat!" and made me feel very, very stupid. with a sinking feeling, i thought, "oh no, she thinks i'm stupid! i'm not going to get a good grade for this oral exam!"
the male teacher beside her held what seemed to be a question paper and started the exam or test or whatever. the first 3 questions were IQ questions and i didn't know the answer to any! he seemed to be smirking as he said, "you don't even know these? tsk." and then he asked me questions about scenarios and how i would respond to them-basically EQ questions. i had an equal number to ticks and crosses and when i saw that, i knew it wasn't a good thing. as the teachers looked at me with disapproving eyes, i cried, "please let me take the test again! i promise i know the answers! please, please!"
it seemed to be a matter of life and death. resignedly, the male teacher agreed and i heaved a sigh of relief. the first question was "does nomstry stretch for kilometres?" i didn't even know what was "nomstry" and i said, "no, it couldn't have." and the next question was "what is nomstry? one, a place in germany. two, a super mail carrier(or something like that). three,(i can't remember). i said one, which contradicts the first answer because if it was a place, it would have stretched for kilometres. i realised the error but it was too late. the male teacher raised his eyebrow and said, "i'm sorry, you couldn't even answer those two questions correctly. even if you did the test again, your results would be the same. and it is dangerous. the only way you can safely pass the test is that if a teacher close to you in school vouches for you. i'm sorry, you are a nice girl."
i was devastated. i wasn't smart enough! i was not smart enough for... for whatever the test was for! my teachers' faces raced through my mind, i only had two teachers whom i'd ever talked to. my form teacher and biology teacher. i realised i wasn't close to any teacher because in school, i'd refused to get close to any of them because i couldn't trust them. it was terrible feeling, that i would end up like this because i knew no teacher who would help me and speak of my good qualities.
i got up and left. along the way i met this guy from channel u, the one who acts as 'david' in "ok!no problem". he was the same age as now but he took the test too! i guess he went back to school. i asked him how he did and he said pretty well but it was because he had gone through the test before when he was my age and he knew they were going to ask those type of IQ questions. i could only dejectedly reply, "you are so lucky."
and for some reason, we walked into a library with no books. the chairs and tables were there but no shelves. i spotted one table, where my friend was seated and we made our way towards her. there were a lot of tkgs girls in uniforms and even tkgs primary school girls. all of a sudden the librarian asked, "who is a tkgs girl?" and when my friend whispered to her, she added "and tkgs primary school girl?" almost everyone raised their hand except that guy and i and i was like, so embarrassed because i didn't fit in anywhere. everyone was so smart.
i woke up thinking, "oh no i'm not smart enough! i am not smart enough..."
littlegirl starlet--------------11:10 am
Tuesday, November 25, 2003
i have decided that when i go out to orchard during the christmas season, i want to walk among the lighted streets of orchard with that special someone (if there ever is a special someone) after the sun sets. would we go hand in hand? i don't know, maybe, maybe not. i'm not a fan of pda(public display of affection). not even holding hands. heh.
ok maybe only maybe if there's a huge crowd. we would leisurely stroll down, past wisma, past taka, maybe a u-turn past paragon. we would just walk and walk and silently admire the glittering street lights. oh look! the hanging coloured fairy lights which hang across the trees. the huge silver tree-like umbrellas which have alternating green and red stripes! the crowd which is wearing a happy face, the sparkling sound of bell chimes. don't you just love it, mr. that-special-someone?
it's not that romantic seeing as how christmas in orchard is getting more overrated and commercialised every year but it's just the atmosphere. you know everyone's down there, just to get a glimpse of the night sky littered with pretty bright "stars", even though they have to be rushing home or they have to go back to work or something. it just catches your heart and fills it with a kind of warmth you can only experience this festive season.
even though i'm not an advocate of relationships, it would be nice; a warm, fuzzy feeling, like a snug sweater in a cold, wintry night in london by the fire. it's nice to share these things with someone but then again, it would be a little painful without, especially if you part just before christmas. ouch ouch ouch.
have you ever dreamt about how it would be like? spending some time each day, week, month, year? with your beau? heh. beau (pronounced as 'bow'.bah!). sure it would be all hearts and flowers but when things turn sour, your heart feels as though it has been wrenched straight out of your heart, with a dagger through it. either you go berserk or you remain behind a sane cover.
littlegirl starlet--------------10:49 pm
Monday, November 24, 2003
blogger is driving me nuts! first, it screws up my lovely template, then it copies my entry. what is wrong with it? count to ten...one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. ahh, i feel better, i think. i really have nothing else to do. i'm afraid to pick up my book because i'd finish it within a day. i'm drawn to books like a moth to a flame. i think i should go to the library tomorrow and borrow. no no, i can't because i'm bringing a small bag! i'll think of something.
oh yes, went out with audrey last thursday and the entry is still hanging in the air. heh. anyway, i saw yu ping. she looks totally grown-up and she was wearing a tube top with a black skirt. surprisingly, it isn't a mini. the hemline was like gradually growing longer, if you know what i mean. i guess i can trust her to look good, as usual.
audrey dear(dangerous tone), was wearing a skirt and basically, all the girls on orchard are wearing skirts and i felt so out because i was wearing my beach clothes. i was going to the beach after that. argh, which reminds me of my resolution to lose all those fat in order to look good in skirts. here i go again, ranting about my legs. honestly. i feel like tearing my hair out. ok not.
next time i go out with audrey dear, i'll have to wear my nice girlie clothes. don't want to look too boyish next to her. i told you, i'm sick of wearing my beach berms all the time. it's not as though this is california and i'm a surfer babe. it's not that i want to look like a grown-up, i just want to look nicer, you know what i mean? perhaps even wear a nice(shudder) dress or something. i'm kidding. i have not entirely stepped into the world of dresses galore. thank goodness!
a wedding dinner's coming up and i want to wear nice clothes. the pants in my wardrobe is black and i don't have a top to match it with. i'll snatch a pair of my mom's evening sandles and buy a new top! yay. i won't have to wear my skirt. it's white! gasp, it's lovely but my ahem, back would look rather wide. have to work now, ugh! to fit into my clothes, ugh! pant, pant, it's tiring but worth it!
littlegirl starlet--------------11:27 pm
i knew i shouldn't have tried to put my thoughts to paper, or rather on screen. no, the previous entry wasn't about my ups and downs. it was about me. but like i said, i shouldn't have tried. never mind.
i slept this afternoon, from one to four. man, i haven't slept like that ever since the exams started and ended. wooh, a full solid 3 hours. tends to give me a headache. i'll be going out tomorrow! with ame. i can't wait to go out. better than returning home. i don't want to return home anymore. i'll miss my computer but it is an inanimate object. no matter how much emotion or feeling i try to pour into it, it doesn't respond! it doesn't talk, it doesn't sigh, it just sits there!
i guess that's the good thing about computers, they don't judge you. but pets like dogs are better, they don't judge you and give you unconditional love! but i can't have a dog. too bad, i'd probably have no time to look after it and i may even unleash my fury onto it when my hot temper flares. then i would be sent to jail for doggie-abuse. nah, it's better not to allow a pet live under me.
it's so sad, no animal will ever get my love. instead, i'll give it to humans whom you are never sure of whether they'll betray you someday. they'll get upset with me or be happy for me and they expect to be loved in return. oh no sure they don't say it but doesn't everyone need love. it's too bad i can't have a pet thinking the world of me and just expecting a little pat on the head or an ear rub.
children are like that you say? don't forget, children grow.
i don't even love cats or dogs or animals for that matter. i like them, but i don't love them. i suppose i just enjoy looking at them through a polished glass window and as they raise a paw to say hello, only imagine what it would be like to have a little puppy or kitty prancing around my room at home.
*loves and hates
loves this layout
loves the OC
hates falling
*songlist
Everywhere you go. Shawn Mullins.
Lullaby. Shawn Mullins.
Sail Away. Vertical Horizon.
I don't want to be. Gavin Degraw.
Storybook Life. Blessed Union of Soul.
Someday. Nickelback.
Grow Up. Garbage.
Higher. Creed.
Back Here. Bbmak.
Pinch Me. Smashmouth.
Dare to Live. Switchfoot.
I think God can explain. Splendor.
Jaded. Aerosmith.
It's all been done. Barenaked Ladies.
Save Me. Unwritten Law.
