i had a horrible dream. all of us were in a school, after the exams. suddenly, the chinese teachers started to get us to sit down and handed out pieces of paper. there were many students and it was rather noisy. it was a messy sight. after some sort of briefing, the crowds dispersed for a break. no one knew what was happen but since there were chinese teachers, i thought it was the chinese 'O's oral exam.
i was scratching my head, wondering why there was another oral exam when we'd already finished our exams. after the break, we congregated in a wide area and in front of us were all these steps. it seemed to be so steep. they asked us to check our register numbers and even though our numbers didn't seem to be right, no one did anything. so we just dumbly sat there.
there were rows and rows of chinese teachers sitting in pairs, behind the school desks, just like chinese oral. it was very complicated and when one teacher told us where to go after our number was called, i couldn't understand. all i could do was to wait and follow the person in front of me.
when my number was called, i frantically ran up the stone steps and when i reached the top, i was overwhelmed by the sight of rows of teachers. my mind went blank and i just stood there in terror. after a while, i scanned the tables in front of me. there were so many teachers, i didn't know who to go to.
so i just walked straight up to the nearest one. and sat down. she didn't look at me, nor respond to my greeting. disheartened, i got up and walked to the table next to it. as i sat down, the teacher cruelly said, "weren't you paying attention to the instructions just now? you don't even know how to get to the correct seat!" and made me feel very, very stupid. with a sinking feeling, i thought, "oh no, she thinks i'm stupid! i'm not going to get a good grade for this oral exam!"
the male teacher beside her held what seemed to be a question paper and started the exam or test or whatever. the first 3 questions were IQ questions and i didn't know the answer to any! he seemed to be smirking as he said, "you don't even know these? tsk." and then he asked me questions about scenarios and how i would respond to them-basically EQ questions. i had an equal number to ticks and crosses and when i saw that, i knew it wasn't a good thing. as the teachers looked at me with disapproving eyes, i cried, "please let me take the test again! i promise i know the answers! please, please!"
it seemed to be a matter of life and death. resignedly, the male teacher agreed and i heaved a sigh of relief. the first question was "does nomstry stretch for kilometres?" i didn't even know what was "nomstry" and i said, "no, it couldn't have." and the next question was "what is nomstry? one, a place in germany. two, a super mail carrier(or something like that). three,(i can't remember). i said one, which contradicts the first answer because if it was a place, it would have stretched for kilometres. i realised the error but it was too late. the male teacher raised his eyebrow and said, "i'm sorry, you couldn't even answer those two questions correctly. even if you did the test again, your results would be the same. and it is dangerous. the only way you can safely pass the test is that if a teacher close to you in school vouches for you. i'm sorry, you are a nice girl."
i was devastated. i wasn't smart enough! i was not smart enough for... for whatever the test was for! my teachers' faces raced through my mind, i only had two teachers whom i'd ever talked to. my form teacher and biology teacher. i realised i wasn't close to any teacher because in school, i'd refused to get close to any of them because i couldn't trust them. it was terrible feeling, that i would end up like this because i knew no teacher who would help me and speak of my good qualities.
i got up and left. along the way i met this guy from channel u, the one who acts as 'david' in "ok!no problem". he was the same age as now but he took the test too! i guess he went back to school. i asked him how he did and he said pretty well but it was because he had gone through the test before when he was my age and he knew they were going to ask those type of IQ questions. i could only dejectedly reply, "you are so lucky."
and for some reason, we walked into a library with no books. the chairs and tables were there but no shelves. i spotted one table, where my friend was seated and we made our way towards her. there were a lot of tkgs girls in uniforms and even tkgs primary school girls. all of a sudden the librarian asked, "who is a tkgs girl?" and when my friend whispered to her, she added "and tkgs primary school girl?" almost everyone raised their hand except that guy and i and i was like, so embarrassed because i didn't fit in anywhere. everyone was so smart.
i woke up thinking, "oh no i'm not smart enough! i am not smart enough..."
